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Friday, January 11, 2013

Dear Women of the World,

It's about to get real in here. Yo.

Someone needs to say this, so I'll do it.

Josh and I were talking and he told me that a girl he works with goes to Planet Fitness. I had never heard of the gym before and didn't know we had one in town. He said that if I went there I would be kicked out, so I did a little research on my own. This gym offers:
A Judgement Free Zone, a Lunk Alarm (it goes off if you're too loud with weights or grunting), and an environment in which anyone - they mean anyone (except heavy lifters or grunters) can be comfortable.

What I want to address here is the fact that we feel the need for a Judgement Free Zone at the gym. I am aware that many women would rather die than set foot in the guy room (free weights) at the gym. I get it. No. I don't get it, but I know a lot of women feel that way. I don't know what it actually is that is so intimidating about it though. As someone who now does all of my weight lifting in the guy room, I can pretty much attest to the fact that I am regarded as invisible. I have two theories as to why this is.

1. I lift more than most of the guys in the guy room, so if they pretend I don't exist they don't have to feel bad about it.

2. (This is the more likely reason.) They don't know I'm there. Have you ever been around a guy who is lifting (and please don't tell me that that you've been the puppy dog girlfriend who follows her guy around while he works out. Please don't do that, ladies.)? If you take a second to look around, you'll notice that no one is looking at you. No one. This is not because you're not hot, because trust me, you are. It is because they think they are the hottest thing in the room, and if they wear their headphones they can't even hear anyone else. If you watch long enough you'll catch them flexing in the mirror every time they turn. They only see themselves in that room. They are the strongest in their own little world where only they belong.

In this participation ribbon world we live in, it is easy to think that everyone is judging us, but if we're being honest, we judge ourselves the hardest.

I'm not making light of the fact that some people are mean. I'm sure people think I'm mean. I think people are too sensitive. I have had more than one blogger write a negative post about me, and that's fine. They can say whatever they want. I am confident enough in myself to not let it bother me. I don't know how I got this way, but I swear, you can too. (Just buy my five disc DVD set for four easy payments of....never mind).

There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing. I don't know who told you there was, or why you believed it, but there isn't. I don't want to go all Dove commercial on you, but seriously. The pressures we put on ourselves to be perfect are too much. We have to be the perfect moms (hellooo Babies-R-Us), with the perfect jobs, and make the perfect crafts with our kids, and make the perfect kids, and have the perfect body (you do realize that in the past, women utilized shape wear far more than we do now, right?) We want to be the walking-talking-living-breathing-Pinterest-Wonder-Woman. Who has time for that? I'm not perfect, but I don't care. Yes, I pin. Yes, I exercise in hopes of being more fit. But there is nothing wrong with who I am now. And the same goes for you. So stand up for yourself. No one is going to respect you if you don't.

And world peace.


  1. I think people are way to sensitive too and I know people think I am mean but I do not care because people just need to get on with going about their life and stop worrying so as you can see I totally 100% agree with you!

  2. Are you sure you're not working as a motivational speaker on the side? As another woman who works out in the guy room I can agree that I am invisible to everyone, unless I need to ask for a bench.

    1. I find that they get nervous when I talk to them. It's funny. :) Is there money to be made in this motivational speaking? I could so rock that.

    2. Haha I know. I'm pretty sure most of the muscle guys are socially awkward. I'm sure you could make lots of money. Look at those people who have seminars all over. They charge an outrageous amount to tell you that you're pretty.

  3. Wait, do you mean an actual, literal, alarm? Who presses the alarm? Can anyone press it? Are there also lights or some description? I'm very interested in this theory. But as for going to the gym, do they really think that women aren't as judge-y as men? The thing that I hate is when some random dude comes over to you to "correct" something you're doing. Love your little speech at the end! So true. Why is it harder to accept yourself than criticize?

    1. True story, a real alarm. It is a sound sensor from what I gather. We are soooo hard on ourselves. So hard. It's sad.

  4. I love weightlifting if you ever need a partner, at the gym let me know, I'm in the process of trying to get a family membership at the Y so getting into shape seems to be my doctors priority for me and I agree I would feel better as a whole. Andrea



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