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Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Lazy, Lazy Ovaries

Well. They still don't want to do their jobs. I feel like I should just let them go sit in a tent at the park.

I did my first cycle of Clomid, and nothing happened.

Well, mostly nothing happened.

My moods actually weren't too bad...except for the night when Josh forgot to bring home tortilla chips. I saw the crazy and I couldn't do anything to stop it.

Since this was only my first cycle I'm not too upset about it. Right now I'm actually not bothered by it. Everything I've read (on the internet, so it's true) says typical results don't happen the first cycle. Whenever my next cycle starts (no idea when that will be as of right now) my dose will be higher, and hopefully we'll find better results. My doctor said she'll do three cycles total and then send me on to a fertility specialist.

Ingrid and I had a short conversation last night about fertility treatments such as in-vitro fertilization. Most of my adult life I've been completely against it. I don't like the thought of it for me. I'm not a super all natural person. I don't have to have the most organic foods, or any for that matter. The only thing I buy in the organic aisle is Josh's special peanut butter (seriously). For some reason though, I wanted all this baby stuff to happen naturally. I was very against using Clomid for a long time. I just wanted it to be something I could do on my own. (I'm stubborn.) But the longer it takes to get pregnant, and the more I read about it, the more IVF seems like it might be okay for me.

My friend Amy just went through the IVF process. We have very different health issues from each other, but being able to follow along with her journey made it seem more manageable to me, and not so clinical.

Ingrid made the point last night that years ago, Josh and I would have just lived the rest of our lives without children. Which is very true. Modern medicine is the reason why we are able to do things like IVF, but they're also the reason why we have drugs like Clomid. My reasoning for drawing the line at Clomid but not going past it doesn't really hold any weight now that she pointed that out.

Right now, I'm trying to say focused on not getting to ahead of myself. I have two more cycles of Clomid that may work and none of this planning will be necessary. I'm trying to stay positive and upbeat about everything that is (or isn't) happening. Some days its hard, and other days it isn't.

Sarah McLaughlin shouldn't be able to have commercials anymore. She is THE WORST.

So in order to stop myself from going into a rambling dialogue, where do you fall on this topic? I know certain religious beliefs dictate how you answer that question, but I am curious of your opinions.

It isn't that I want you to agree with me, I want to hear your point of view. I appreciate hearing from you.


  1. Angi,

    I think I've told you this before but I have friends that live in Indy and I know they were having troubles having a baby. She and I grew up in church together and aren't super close but our husbands are good friends and talk frequently. Anyway, I'm not sure what all she had to go through, but if you would like I could contact her and have her touch base with you to talk. They are strong Christians and her husband is a pastor at their church. Just throwing that out there.

    As for me, I don't really have an opinion either way. I guess I've never really thought about it as I haven't faced wanting a child yet nor having difficulties getting pregnant. All I can say is pray. Pray that God reveals His plan for your life and that you may have peace and comfort through such a trying time.

    Love you bunches!!


  2. thanks for the mention in your blog:) I told myself that I would NEVER do IVF. mainly for money reasons and that its not a guarantee. but the more I went down the road of infertility the more I was determined to keep trying. I was definitely sad that I couldn't do things naturally. I do not like taking any kind of medicine unless I really have to. My issue was my tubes were very blocked. I struggled with the decision to have my tubes removed to increase my chance of success for a healthy baby. This was heartbreaking to do because I lost all hope of a "miracle" natural pregnancy. But after over 2 years of trying I figured it wasn't going to happen for me.

    THrough all the hard decisions and struggles and waiting I am now 8 weeks pregnant and that was my ultimate goal. So now I don't care that I don't have my tubes anymore. And the injections were not near as bad as I feared.

    You will figure out what is right for you guys.



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